Widely recognised in South Africa for his talent both in front of and behind the camera, Wandile Molebatsi is an accomplished actor, film producer, and the visionary founder of Coal Stove Pictures.
With a career that began in childhood, he has grown into one of the country’s most respected creatives in the film and television industry. The star has since built an impressive career, starring in shows such as The Wild, Hola Mpinji, Intersexions, Kowethu, and more.
But beyond the spotlight, he’s a devoted husband and hands-on father of two. Having been married for over a decade to stylist and fashion designer Jessica Jane, Wandile speaks passionately about their family life with their son, Elijah Aruna, and daughter, Onalenna.
He describes fatherhood as a great privilege—one that comes with the responsibility of raising children in a world where gender roles, cultural identity, and values are constantly evolving.
He says parenting alongside Jessica has been a journey of love, compromise, and faith. While their marriage hasn’t always been smooth sailing — especially as partners in both life and business — Wandile says they’ve found strength in embracing each other’s differences.
He credits Jessica for sharpening his emotional intelligence, gently guiding him to show up more intentionally for their children. Their Christian faith, he adds, plays a central role in how they parent, set boundaries, and nurture their children with mutual respect.
As a multicultural family, raising biracial children in South Africa has come with its own set of challenges and learning curves. Wandile and Jessica intentionally have had open conversations about race and heritage from an early age.
For Wandile, fatherhood isn’t about perfection — it’s about presence and laying down a foundation of love that his children can always return to.
The star opened up to Goodwill Thomo about his journey through fatherhood, his marriage, and the experience of raising his two mixed-race children.
- Could you share a bit about your family dynamic and how your two children bring joy to your lives?
Being a father to both a boy and a girl is a huge privilege and responsibility. South Africa’s challenges with toxic masculinity present me with the task of raising my son to be a respectful, intelligent, and sensitive man, while also teaching him the importance of a supportive patriarchy that allows for individual expression. At the same time, I must raise my daughter to be a strong, confident woman. With our Christian background, we believe in the importance of a nuclear family, where the roles of husband and wife are equally valuable and none supersedes the other. On a lighter note, it’s been amazing to see how different they are. Our son has the typical boy tendencies — breaking things and climbing trees — while our daughter is quite a lady. They’ve ended up fitting those stereotypes, which I honestly didn’t expect, but it’s been a wonderful blessing.
- How has your experience as a father been, and what memorable highs and challenging lows have you faced along the way?
The highs and lows of fatherhood as an entrepreneur are varied. As a father, my main drive is to provide for my family, and Jessica and I are committed to creating a loving home filled with laughter and joy. However, we also believe in teaching our kids the value of hard work. They need to understand that nothing comes easily, and that effort leads to results. We’ve started giving them allowances to help them grasp the concept of money.
Representing the role of a father to my son and daughter is incredibly rewarding. Fatherhood and raising children is definitely the greatest challenge I’ve faced, but the highs are often simple moments, like a few weeks ago when we watched The Incredibles. I looked around the room, saw my son laughing at the jokes, and my daughter dancing to a Bruno Mars song. At that moment, I realised that my dream of having a family had truly come to life.
- You have been married to Jessica for over 10 years. How has parenting with her been like?
Jess and I are now in 2025 in our 12th year of marriage, and it’s been amazing. It’s not always easy, especially since we work together, are in a romantic relationship, and are married. But seeing how our differences complement each other has been a blessing. I still consider us young in marriage; my parents have been married for 45 years and have set a great example. Marriage isn’t about picture-perfect moments; it’s about work.
I love what Michelle Obama said about marriage — this idea of a 50/50 partnership isn’t always true. There are times when Jess is pulling 70% and I’m at 30%, whether it’s because I’m emotionally exhausted or dealing with a financial issue and vice versa. The beauty of marriage is that we take the lead at different times, which is what makes the partnership work.
In our 12th year, I still sometimes feel like we’ve only been married six years. I forget how long it’s been, but I’m thankful for it. Our marriage hasn’t felt like a painful struggle; I love that every morning I choose to love my wife. Marriage isn’t always easy — we argue about kids, money, and even things like what colour the blankets should be or where to put the dishwasher. But the beauty is in sticking through the tough times together, believing in each other, and investing in the relationship.
Having Jess as a partner has been vital for me, especially since my emotional intelligence isn’t always the best. She has to remind me of things, like when Elijah needs me to show more love or when Onalenna needs clearer boundaries. It’s been a continuous learning curve. I spent time with my father recently, and he said, “Every day, you need to learn and grow with your partner.” He’s been married for 45 years, and it hit me — marriage never gets easier, but when you look back, you realise how blessed you are to have the partner you do.
- Raising two children of different racial backgrounds must be an exciting journey. Can you describe what that experience has been like for you as parents?
Raising two children from different racial backgrounds in South Africa has been an incredible journey. In this context, you can’t avoid the issue of race. Jessica and I discussed this a lot before talking to Elijah about race and the racial dynamics he would encounter here. I’m glad we made that decision. Elijah has been asked why his dad looks different from him or why his mom is so different, and we’ve grounded him in the understanding that being biracial is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s simply how life unfolds for him.
Their grandmother, who lives in the UK, affectionately calls them her “caramel cupcakes” and has always supported us in making them aware of the possibility that they may not look like other kids. But that doesn’t matter. Especially in Gauteng, where biracial children are represented, including those of mixed Black, Indian, Chinese, and White backgrounds, I’m grateful they aren’t unfamiliar with being biracial. Still, it’s something we don’t ignore. If we pretend it doesn’t exist, it will catch them off guard later. Honest conversations about race are crucial in South Africa — it’s a reality we can’t shy away from.
Culturally, Jessica’s Scottish and Mauritian heritage plays a big role in our family, and it’s essential to respect both sides of their backgrounds. I remember discussing with Jessica’s uncles how important it is for Elijah to connect with his Scottish roots, like understanding his family crest or tartan. As a father, it’s my responsibility to encourage that pride. Similarly, my daughter needs to understand how her diverse heritage enriches her. A Venda boy can marry a Tsonga girl, and the beauty lies in that shared experience. Embracing and celebrating diversity is vital—it’s something we should encourage our children to do, not hide.
This idea of navigating two cultural backgrounds is something I’ve lived with all my life. My father, who is Tswana and Xhosa, always made sure I didn’t ignore either side of my heritage. I’m proud of both, and it’s shaped me in many ways. On a personal level, understanding multiple cultures has even helped me in my career, like auditioning for roles in different languages or dialects. I’ve learned that no culture is superior to another and that respect for all backgrounds brings strength. My father’s approach, grounded in love and respect, has taught me this. His deep Christian faith also reinforced that, first and foremost, we are all human beings, and we need to love and care for one another. Without that, chaos would ensue.
- How do you approach teaching your children about both of your cultures? Are there any traditions or customs that are especially important to you as a family?
Teaching my kids about culture has been a relatively easy journey for us because we’ve always embraced being proud of both our Tswana and Xhosa heritages. At weddings or funerals, there are specific traditions and behaviours we’ve always followed, and navigating them has never been complicated. Our Christian background has also played a significant role, allowing my father to teach us to respect people with different spiritual beliefs, including those who pray to their ancestors.
When my children ask tough questions like, “Does God exist?” or wonder why others follow different religions, I approach them the same way my father did with me and my brothers. There was never a sense of othering when it came to ancestral worship or people with different religious views, whether Islam, Judaism, or Hinduism. My father always emphasised unity and respect for all beliefs. This approach has made it easier to discuss culture and religion openly and comfortably, as it was something we learned at a young age.
- Have there been any particular challenges you’ve faced in raising interracial children, and how have you navigated those challenges together?
There have absolutely been challenges. South Africa has only been free for 30 years, and even that is debatable. Race relations are still deeply ingrained in our society, and raising interracial children or being an interracial couple in this context has been difficult, given our history. We once did a podcast with Mmuisi Maimane and his wife, Natalie, and it was eye-opening to see how different their experiences were. While both face racism, prejudice, and classism, their approach to these situations is one of understanding rather than confrontation, which often disarms aggression.
I try to convey that same mindset to my children. When someone makes a rude comment or gives a strange look, I remind them that those people just don’t understand. It’s important that whether you’re interracial or come from a single cultural background, you face challenges with love. This fundamentally changes the tone of any conversation. Some people may think Jess and I live in an idealistic bubble, but in reality, starting with love is harder and much more empowering.
I want my children to know that no matter what they’re called — whether it’s because they’re mixed-race, light-skinned, or anything else — they are anchored in love. Their mother and father are proud of who they are, and that foundation helps them navigate the world. The home is a safe space where much of their sense of self is formed, and I’m very mindful of what I say. Comments like “white people have all the money” or “black people should take over the country” can subconsciously influence their thinking. I have to be careful with my words because I know Elijah and Onalenna trust me to teach them what’s acceptable and how to respond to prejudice. As a father, it’s my responsibility to guide them through these complexities, and while I don’t always get it right, I try my best to lead by example.
- In terms of education, do you make a conscious effort to expose your kids to diverse experiences and perspectives? If so, how do you go about that?
The way I handle racial conflicts is influenced by Jess’s approach—she always deals with the person first. Depending on how they respond, she then decides how to move forward. The most important thing I continue to learn is to respond to the person, not the colour of their skin. It’s a tough lesson, and I don’t always get it right but it’s about understanding that people often respond from a place of trauma, whether they’ve had a bad experience with an Afrikaner, a black person, or anyone else. As a father, I think it’s crucial to teach my children that some people are just beautiful, kind souls, while others may be dealing with inner turmoil. Whether they’re black or white doesn’t matter; some people act out or make racist comments because they’re unhappy with themselves.
- How do you address questions about race when your children ask? Do they ever bring up things they’re curious about related to their backgrounds?
Every interracial or intercultural relationship is unique, so I’m hesitant to give advice as if I’m an expert. The best advice I received from my brother was that becoming one in marriage is challenging. You enter marriage with your own experiences, and when raising children, it’s important not to impose those experiences on them. Let them find their own way. It’s tough but being aware of this as a parent is crucial.
I’ve learned a lot from a group I’m part of called Dope Black Dads. It’s a community of men focused on changing the narrative around black men, particularly regarding absent fathers. The group encourages responsible fatherhood, which applies to interracial families as well. Whether you’re in a marriage with someone of a different race, culture, or religion, approach it with openness. Love should be your guiding principle.
Sometimes relationships don’t work, and it’s not always about race; it might just be that you’re not meant to be together. It’s hard to accept, but acknowledging it is important. As Africans, we often assume issues are racial when they might not be. And when I say Africans, I mean people from across the continent, not just black Africans. We’ve been wronged as a people, and sometimes, we mistakenly label personal conflict as racism when someone simply isn’t a good person.
- How do you celebrate and encourage your children to express their individual identities, especially as they grow older and understand their multicultural heritage?
I think about celebrating my kids in two ways: one is celebrating their achievements, like school successes or completing tasks. The best way to do this is by spending time with them. For example, Elijah has a dog named Bumba, and his task is to take care of it, including reminding us to buy food. Onalenna’s responsibility is to collect dishes after dinner. They earn allowances and learn how to spend money.
The other way to encourage them is by showing up at events like a school gala or Onalenna’s ballet exam and supporting them even if they’ve made mistakes. Modern parents often overcompensate with praise, but I think it’s more important for kids to feel like they’re striving toward a meaningful goal. It’s not about just wanting excellence; they should push themselves. It’s a difficult balance because you want to celebrate them, but you also need to recognise when they haven’t given their best. Sometimes, you must tell them honestly that they can do better.
As parents, we want our kids to strive for excellence, but we also need to celebrate their achievements. The world is changing quickly, and there’s always more to learn. Encouraging curiosity and a passion for learning is something we must foster.
- Have you faced any misconceptions or stereotypes about your family, and how do you handle those situations when they arise?
Yes, we’ve definitely faced misconceptions. Coming from a Scottish Christian background, there are often misunderstandings from both sides. One example is explaining to Jess’s aunt that lobola isn’t an attempt to purchase her but a token of appreciation. On my side, my aunts didn’t understand that Jess’s family wouldn’t be slaughtering sheep with us at 4:30 AM.
Misconceptions aren’t just about black and white – they can happen across any culture, like black to Indian or Indian to Chinese. Both sides need to meet halfway. We’ve also faced assumptions that Jess’s family is rich or that my family is politically connected. These misconceptions can be funny or frustrating. The key is to talk openly and give space for understanding. My friend Tebogo says, “Hold space for people” — allow them to express their views. If we don’t, misconceptions can grow into resentment.
Jess does this well by creating conversations that ask questions, helping people understand each other’s cultures.
- Do you have any special rituals or bonding moments as a family that help strengthen your children’s connection to both of your backgrounds?
We don’t have any formal rituals, but there are certain activities I do with each child. For example, Elijah and I have a tradition of getting our haircuts together before school opens, followed by grabbing a cheeseburger and talking. It’s our “guy thing.” Jess and Onalenna also have their own bonding moments, like shopping together.
While I don’t label these moments rituals, they help strengthen our connections. With Elijah, for instance, we spend time playing soccer, which also allows me to check in with him about school or any struggles he’s facing. Elijah is a firecracker and can be demanding, so I try to teach him that controlling his emotions is a superpower. Emotions can either make or break you and learning how to manage them is crucial.
I’ve started telling him that understanding his emotions is a superpower. I focus on teaching him to understand why he’s angry rather than just suppressing those emotions. I also believe there’s a balance in modern parenting — sometimes we go too far, trying to sit down and explain everything. While that has its place, there are times when I need to be clear with Elijah: “I’m your father. You will wake up at this time and do your chores.” He needs to understand that there’s a hierarchy in life, and as long as it’s done with love and safety, it’s important.
As fathers, we have to instill discipline. At 20:00, it’s time for bed, no screen time. Elijah, at 10 years old, can’t make those decisions on his own. But if I set those boundaries in a loving way, he’ll understand. Men shouldn’t shy away from this role in the home. Discipline and routine, when healthy, are essential, and they need to be established with love. It’s not about pushing him to study all night or practice soccer endlessly but about teaching him discipline and order in a way that’s safe and loving.
It’s important for children to know that their father sets boundaries — what’s allowed and what’s not — and that there’s a trusted space they can turn to when they’re struggling.
The ritual Elijah and I have is about stopping, breathing, and thinking before reacting. When he gets upset with his sister, I remind him to pause and think: “Is what you’re about to say going to hurt her? Why are you angry? Being angry is okay, but how you express that anger should be loving.” I want him to understand that emotional irritation isn’t bad; it’s how you use that feeling that’s powerful. I try to make it fun and teach him that managing emotions is a superpower.